Let’s face it, we are all at times something other than ourselves. Kevin has on many occasions become “mean daddy” as Kendra used to say. I, myself, have been Ms. Sheila (spoken in a Bahamian accent), the tooth fairy, monster, horse, nurse, a friend and the list goes on. Gosh, we have big shoes to fill.
I often find myself asking my mom how they did this – this parenting thing? Well, one thing is I was the only child (mom seconded that ;-)), a pretty quiet child and in daycare. 🙂 Not to disregard the parenting my mother and father did. I did talk incessantly and I’m sure there were other things that I can’t remember which required nerves of steel. Yes, we parents have nerves of steel or some very imaginative ways to cope. There are days I want to be INVISIBLE, but until I find some way to produce super human powers (I’ve tried) I will just have to settle for mommy night outs occasionally.
In church we have been learning some Life Apps and going through the book of James. Pastor Chris has mentioned over and over that this book is hard to wrap your mind around, that it is Word that we often want to skip over or skip certain parts. Personally, I have not found that to be the case. It has pushed and inspired me, actually, to the point that I am scrutinizing myself to no end. I know I am not where I want to be as a Christian, or as a mom for that matter. I’m probably harder on myself. Aren’t we usually the first condemn ourselves? I have been in a constant state of turmoil for years and especially since becoming a parent. Am I doing my best? Am I good enough? Why is A not like B, Kelly’s kid? We do that as parents. Even as others praise us, like the friend from my last post, we drown ourselves in “yeah rights” and put even more pressure on.
The silver lining – YES, there is one! – is this:
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him. John 3:17
If God does not condemn then why do we? Is that fair to do that to ourselves if He will not even do that to us? It’s almost like not obeying Him and expecting to hear His word. “The less we are manipulated by the expectations of others, the more we are open to the expectations of God, ” says Richard Foster. We are weak and we will fail but He is strong and He prevails (a little quip I coined). As the Women’s Devotional bible states, [we need] “to discover who we are in the light of his love, freedom and grace.”
Even though our roles may be parent, princess, superhero or therapist in the end we are His sheep and I don’t need to fill big shoes. It’s already been done. Amen!